Band Geek

I was a teenage band geek. I thought I could be cool by signing up to play drums, but it didn't turn out as I expected. First of all, my band director said they needed a girl to play bells, not drums .
I was the only girl who signed up for drums, but nobody knew my name. They, including the band director, called me bells. There was no way I could be popular or cool if nobody knew my name!

Second, the guys (the drummers) tortured me. It was the worse six year hazing of my life. It only stopped once I became section leader and an officer in the band. That's when I started making freshmen girls cry and treating the boys like my servants.

My reign didn't last long. I quit at the start of my senior year, but years of crude comments, second class treatment and sexual harassment turned me into the person I am today.

You can imagine my surprise when my son wanted to sign up for band. He originally wanted to play trombone. His other choices were trumpet and tuba. I tried to be encouraging after nagging him that with his personality and talents, he wasn't going to be satisfied playing second fiddle or whole or half notes when other people would play the melody. I realized I was channeling my inner stage mother and told him to play whatever he wanted to play.

Yesterday, he took his tuba home.
Yes, a tuba. I knew he changed his mind over the summer, but I wasn't sure he would go for it. I needed convincing to be OK with it and talked to a friend who played tuba with either DCI or a DCI-type group. He kept stressing how skinny tuba players get laid.

Guy: "He's going to get laid."
Me: "My son is in sixth grade and 11."
Guy: "Skinny tuba players have a better chance of getting laid. I got on Accutane, got skinny and got a lot of ass."
Me: "He's 11. And my son."
Guy: "He's going to get laid."
Me: "He's in sixth grade."
Guy: "Yeah, tell him he'll get laid."
Me: Grr.

My son is not skinny, so I found a little bit of comfort in our conversation.

Over the weekend, we went to a birthday party for a friend's baby. My friend's husband was in band with me. Dan'l mentioned he was playing tuba and the husband was much more encouraging about other aspects of playing tuba. He said that band directors love kids who play instruments which aren't very popular and would do anything to keep them.

Dan'l felt special.

I'm not sure if Dan'l will stay in band though. Richard wants Dan'l to play baseball in school. I want Dan'l to play golf. (Little-known secret: there are tons of full scholarships, especially at smaller schools, for golf players that go to mediocre players because there aren't enough kids, especially girls, who golf.)

Graduation is still six years away, but I guess it's not too early to start thinking about stuff. Of course, I took a bunch of sciences and maths that ended up being a waste of my time in high school. I think I use my home ec skills more than I do calculating mass or acceleration. I should have signed up for cosmetology classes instead. Oh well. Anyway, it's not about me; it's about Dan'l and his future. Because in the future, he will end up supporting me.